Steps

As the day comes to an end and I make my walk back to the convent I am staying at for evening vespers, i begin thinking about steps.  There are the 117 stair steps from the market I go to each night to buy my fruit to my convent and then once inside the convent there are the 59 stair steps up to my room.  Yes, each step I take brings me closer to my goal.  In this case, getting into by room to take off the hiking boots and put on the sandals and freshen up before heading downstairs to the chapel.  But what about the bigger picture of my life and my life goal?  Where are my everyday steps taking me?

Having spent the day, mainly focused on the early fathers of our church and their crosses which they happily carried following Christ to their death, a death by martyrdom, I think of our journey in this world. From the prison chains of Paul and his tomb located in St. Paul's Outside the Walls, 

to Peter's prison chains at St. Peter's in Chains, 

or simply the coliseum where early Christians died for their faith, 

or visiting the church that houses the head of John the Baptist, 

among many more.  It draws me in, to think about these humans that showed extraordinary strength when faced with persecution.  Where did that extraordinary strength come from?  From the very source of strength from their faith in God and the grace He bestows on those that trust in Him.  I reflect back to high school, when our theater department did the play the crucible.  I remember as a 9th grader just thinking, all they had to do was say they denounce God (meanwhile telling God they did not mean it) and that they were a witch and they could save their life (after all God would understand).  It was not until I was in college with my intervarsity group, that somewhere along the way I came to understand, why they gave their life versus denouncing God.  To die for your faith, how many are really willing to make that sacrifice?  

Most of us will never be forced to denounce our faith or die, but everyday we make choices that denounce our faith.  When we are afraid to say a blessing for our meal because we are in public.  When we do not correct someone that has made an inappropriate joke or comment about our faith.  When we fail to give credit to God for the blessing in our life and instead take the credit. In so many ways, we put God aside.  One of the reflections, that I had early on this trip when I was writing the things to help me grow was that everything either brings me closer to God or pulls me away.  I then made a conscious effort to rid myself of those things which distract.  In this case it was simply deleting my card game on the IPAD which I did when I wanted to waste time waiting.

Once again, we are constantly taking steps and hopefully those steps bring us closer to God and not pulling us away from Him.  As I have walked around Rome and down the incline and declines, I thought of a homily by Father Jason Cargo sometime last Fall.  He spoke about his time studying in Rome and he ran a marathon around the city.  About the last 5k, he did not think he could go any further and one of his fellow priest saw Father Jason struggling to take the next steps.  His brother priest, came out of the crowd in his dress clothes (including loafers) and ran the remainder of the way beside Father Jason encouraging him the entire way.  

We are not meant to take our steps alone and together we can bring one another to the finish line to the ultimate goal. I came on pilgrimage alone (yes, God has been with me without a doubt) and yet at every place I have made friends from my Italian Mamas, the French woman Silvia at the halfway house, the Vietnamese pilgrims whom the Monseigneur made a point to tell his joke twice once in Vietnamese and once in English - just so I could laugh with everyone else, the Indian sisters and Priest from the Papal Audience that are expecting me to come to their place, or the Holland gang that I spent part of the day with as we discovered a hidden tomb and walked around a cemetery together.  Our pilgrimage in this world is not meant for us to take it alone.  So instead of hiding our faith, share your faith.  As Jesus told the disciples, 'do not be afraid.'  I think fear is what causes most of us to not speak up or act out on our faith.  Our society is all about being politically correct but part of being politicically correct, is allowing you to live your faith while others can coincided and live their faith.  After all, you never know when acting on your faith, living your faith will draw someone else into the faith.  So start where you are and begin making steps, even if they are slow at first, kind of like me doing the final steps to my room each night after vespers!  Then as you begin making steps to get to your ultimate destination be like Father Jason's friend and help someone else whom is struggling to take their next step!  God Bless!